Major Project: Timeline, Scene directions and leaving a scene early.

I think the good thing with Sunday League was not having specific events that meant my Time line wasn't restricted. None of the matches were set for a christmas theme, for example which meant i could move the story along at the pace i wanted. This is similar to inbetweeners where the only specific time frame is during school time. My time frame is only during football season. other than that i have flexibility. This was useful when it came to don's wife's story as it meant i could speed up her illness without it causing timeline or unrealistic issues. 

I also wanted to make my stage directions as punchy as possible.
"The description; the action; the action line; the stage directions – these are all terms used 
to describe the narrative portion of a screenplay, the material that, along with the dialogue, 

makes up the physical writing in screenwriting. For clarity and consistency, I’m going to 

refer to the narrative portion of a screenplay as the stage directions in this article.

Crafting quality descriptive prescriptives or stage directions is one of the hardest aspects of screenwriting for film scribes to master. It’s hard because all stage directions are meant to be is description: a simple explanation of what – characters, action, and imagery – is meant to appear on screen during a particular scene. All of the elements that are usually considered hallmarks of “good” writing – clever wordplay; literary style; elaborate descriptions of setting and characters; intricate explorations of the characters’ internal thoughts and feelings; and so on – have no place in this type of writing and their inclusion can (and usually does) actually impede the screenwriting’s effectiveness. Therefore, the stage directions in a screenplay are most effective when the wording is as simple, tight, and stripped down as possible. At the same time, it can’t be boring and must engage the reader. So it’s quite a challenge.To meet it, you must write clearly, and directly. Tell us what is meant to be seen on screen without enhancement or embellishment. Use short sentences – with one idea (one action, one piece of description, etc.) per sentence to maximize clarity. Employ short, punchy paragraphs in order to make the script easy to read. Avoid long sentences and paragraphs – reading description can be tedious under the best of circumstances and will absolutely become so if you force your reader to hack her/his way through giant blocks of type. You want your readers to put their energy into understanding and enjoying your tale, not into the physical process of reading it. And also, the experience of reading the script should indicate the experience you want the audience to have when watching the eventual movie it proposes. If you employ short sentences and brief one, two, or three line paragraphs, your reader will be able to experience the story with the same energy and kinetic pacing that you presumably want the movie to have."

This was a great help to me. I really tried to focus on clever word play but at times found it difficult to find a word to describe what i was trying to get across. 

BBC writers room was also a great source of information

"OK - this week I thought I'd hand over the blog to David Roden. He works with me as part of the Academy team, and his job is mostly to read scripts that are sent to us. I asked him what he thought... he did this:

"I read scripts.

I read a lot of scripts.

I can't tell you how many scripts I've read this year because I've lost count.

I get asked on a reasonably regular basis "what makes a script stand out?" 

I read so many of them, and have read so many over the years, I can tell very quickly what I've got in store for me as I pass from page two to page three and onwards. 

Most days I'm never wrong, but some days ... and, god I love those days ... some days I couldn't be more wrong about what a script holds in store for me. Some brilliant soul out there has told me a story that completely knocks me for six.

That's why I am passionate about the job I do. There are a lot of brilliant writers out there ... and also some good writers... some competent but dull writers... writers who are technically not brilliant but have something really exciting to say... and some very deluded people who think they can write... and I read scripts from all of them on a daily basis. Not all writers are the same.

But every single time, I will pick the "technically not very accomplished but got a spark of something really special" script over the "technically hugely accomplished but got no life or heart at all" script. I promise you. Structure can be taught. Heart, passion, and soul can't.

A trial script for a TV soap... I will scream if I get sent another bloody one of these. I want original scripts - something a writer is passionate about. Not some half-arsed attempt at a soap you barely watch.

Cop Shows full of clichés - such as: a rogue detective with psychic powers; good cop / bad cop routine with dialogue ripped off from Quentin Tarantino's back catalogue of films; cop with a self-destructive vice because they've lost their partner in a failed bank robbery; high flier with a dark secret goes back to seaside fishing village where they were born; blah, blah, blah.

Short Film Scripts - a completely different medium and style and format. Don't ... just, don't.

Angels and Demons - science-fiction scripts that feature an age old battle between heaven and hell in a post-apocalyptic city that are pitched at a Saturday tea time slot - and, one of the main characters has died and is trapped in this limbo, and to find a way out they have to solve the mystery of how and why they died. You might think I'm joking, but I get at least two versions of this story a week. Every week. Please don't be derivative of your favourite shows - be unique and bold and brilliant. Make me sit up and say, I wish I'd thought of that. 

Starting with a voice over or a monologue - just because the brilliant 'American Beauty' did it, doesn't mean every script should start that way. More often than not, it's a lazy way of imparting information.

Directing in the Stage Directions - 'whip pan to', or 'crash zoom', or 'crane up to ...' Stop it! Stop it now! You are telling me a story, not telling me how you would direct it. Your stage directions should be brilliant prose. They should read like a novel - an un-put-down-able novel. They should be sparse, exciting, precise, punchy, create an atmosphere, make me laugh, draw me in ... but NEVER tell me how it should be directed, because I'll assume that you'd rather be a director instead. Read a Russell T Davies script - he is the master of genius stage directions.

Irrelevant Stage Directions ...please don't give me too many stage directions that tell me information about characters' family trees or feelings... a note I often give is 'can we try to find a way of dramatizing the stage directions'... if you can't dramatize it, cut it out, it isn't necessary. And, don't break up a wonderful, passionate piece of dialogue to say something bland like: 'She sits down slowly' or 'She nervously fiddles with the toggle on her parka' ... "

Get in late, leave early...

William Goldman said, “You always attack a movie scene as late as you possibly can. You always come into the scene at the last possible moment.” The same rule applies at the end of a scene. Get the hell out – quick!

A scene in a screenplay should begin as late as possible. What does this mean? Let's take an example. 
A husband and wife have been separated. The husband is the protagonist in the story. He and his wife are meeting for lunch to talk about their future. The wife is going to tell him she wants a divorce. 
Most beginners would spend a lot of time getting the husband to this lunch meeting. He might take some time deciding what he is going to wear. He might dawdle on the way, so as not to be early and appear to be anxious. He might fortify himself with a drink or two. Finally he'll be met at the restaurant by a hostess and led to the booth where his wife waits. They'll be small talk. A waiter will take an order for drinks. More small talk. A waiter will take their lunch orders. More small talk. Eventually they'll get around to talking about their marriage, at which time the wife will say she wants a divorce. 
Although there are dramatic contexts in which this slow development can work (see below), in most cases this scene will be too slow. It has too much fat. What is the point of the scene? The news of divorce. A more skilled screenwriter, therefore, would open the scene just before this moment. The couple is already seated at lunch. They are eating silently. Suddenly the wife pops the news. 
But there is a context in which the slow version is stronger than the more efficient version. Let's say that while getting ready, the husband fetches a handgun, loads it, and hides it on his person. Now where there was slow development and fat before, there is tension because we are on the edge of our seats, wondering what he is going to do with the gun. And the longer we have to wait, the more tense the story becomes. 
In other words, for slowly developing scenes to work, there must be an element to justify their pacing. In general, the crisper the scene, the better. 
When Should a Scene End? 
What about getting out of this scene? 
In the first version, without the gun, beginners would have the wife pop the news and have this lead into an argument, probably the kind of argument we've heard many times before. This argument may take several pages, even though we learn nothing new from it. 
A more skilled screenwriter might have the wife's news be the last line in the scene. A quick look at the husband's reaction and cut: maybe to the husband having a drink in a bar, or talking with a friend, or sleeping with his mistress. 
Once again, the gun changes everything because it adds a dynamic new element to the dramatic mix. The wife gives the news. A beginning writer might have the husband take out the gun and shoot her. Chaos results. The husband is wrestled to the ground by customers. He barely gets away. 
A more skilled screenwriter would surprise us. The husband takes out the gun and points it at his temple. Would he really? The wife looks like she's about to have a heart attack. He pulls the trigger. Nothing. "I was going to shoot you but I chickened out," he says. "I took out the bullets. Have a nice life." He leaves.

Major Project: structure

I looked into detail into the structure of a half an hour sitcom. 

The black list define this as:

The half-hour format is usually reserved for more comedic series, including the sitcom. These series follow a three act structure, often including a teaser (also called a “cold open”) and a tag at the end.

My series has a teaser and a tag at the end which came natural to my writing but also something a lot of my favourite shows do. So i was heavily influenced by this. 

I also stumbled across a guide produced by a first time screen writer that they had found useful. It became one of my main referrals.

https://wisesloth.files.wordpress.com/2012/06/sitcom-analysis.pdf

1-3 min Intro	Establish what the protagonist wants.
3-8 min Cataclysm	An obstacle appears between the protagonist and his goal. The protagonist reacts to the antagonist/obstacle in his own signature fashion. Cut to a new scene that establishes what the minor character wants and how he plans to get it. Cut to a new scene where the protagonist comes up with a plan to neutralize his primary obstacle.
8-13 min Complications and Escalation	The protagonist enacts his plan, but he’s blocked by a minor obstacle. The protagonist comes up with a plan to neutralize the minor obstacle in his way. Cut to a new scene that shows the minor character enacting his plan and running into his own resistance. Cut to a new scene where the protagonist enacts his plan and succeeds or fails at overcoming the minor obstacle.
13- 18 min The Showdown	If the protagonist failed to overcome his sub-obstacle then he comes up with a new plan to neutralize his main obstacle given this new limitation. If he succeed at neutralizing his minor obstacle then he confronts the main obstacle directly with the new strength/resource he gained from his success. Cut to a new scene where the minor character confronts their primary obstacle and either succeeds or fails at neutralizing it. Cut to a new scene where the protagonist pulls out his last resort and throws a hail-Mary to beat the antagonist. The protagonist either wins or loses.
18-21 min The Sunset	Show where this chain of events leaves the protagonist and the minor character.

It really had some great points especially about having a show with lots of characters.

"If you’re writing a sitcom with four or five recurring protagonists like “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia” and you want to give screen time to all the characters then you’ll have a hard time fitting in four quests even without trying to squeeze in a minor character’s subquest. In that case you can split your four protagonists into two protagonists with two heads. In “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia” Mac and Dennis will often team up with each other to solve a common goal/obstacle while Charlie and Frank collaborate on a separate goal/obstacle leaving Dee to play a minor character with her own subplot. In another episode Frank, Dee and Mac might solve a common problem (though they each have their own reasons for doing so) while Charlie and Dee team up to collaborate on a separate problem. You can cut the cake anyway you want."

It was a perfect guide and something i will utilise in the future heavily. 

Major Project: research into dementia

I knew i needed to have a strong amount of research behind the dementia storyline and although i have past experience of the alzheimer's from working in the NHS and with patients with this condition.

One big part of my research was in the progression of the disease.
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documents_info.php?documentID=133

This article talks about how "A wide range of factors influence how quickly someone's dementia will progress. These include age - people who develop symptoms before 65 often have a faster progression. " 
As Don's wife is 48 i wanted her dementia to have already been diagnosed but Don in a high level of denial about the rapidly escalating condition. I felt that perhaps Don would have asked for help from very close friends but perhaps felt a great deal of responsibility to keep his wife's condition hidden of how bad things were getting from his family. It was however difficult to tackle such a difficult subject in a half an hour series. 

These are some of the mild - moderate symptoms:

• becoming confused about where they are, or walking off and becoming lost
• muddling up time and getting up at night because they are mixing up night and day
• behaving in ways that may seem unusual, such as going outside in their nightclothes, becoming very agitated or unknowingly behaving in socially inappropriate ways
• experiencing difficulty with perception and, in some cases, having delusions (strongly believing things that are not true) or, less often, hallucinations (usually, seeing things that are not really there)

This is the stage i feel Don's wife would be at. 

This video was a really interesting family dynamic, It was really interesting to hear Trevor's own views on dementia and that really helped shape the scene with Julia where she comes to the realisation she would be better placed in the care home. Although this was a tough scene it, also was one of the most interesting to work on as it involved a lot of my research into the topic. 

Major Project: Strengthening B and C plots

At times during the production i felt my sub plots weren't as complex and detailed as my main plot. Usually the main plot would involve the lead character for that episode. In ILF that lead character was Tom and his scenes with Ollie were my most well planned. But my scenes with Nath and Jake and Dean and Lucy were not as punchy.
I decided to find out a bit more about B plots to see what i could do to mine to make it work more effectively:

"The B story is less clear, though. This is the story of the central emotional relationship as seen through the eyes of the protagonist. In other words, the love interest in a romance or romantic comedy, the friend in the buddy pic, the kid in a father/daughter picture. This is the emotional heart of the picture, and even a rough and tumble picture like “Die Hard” has one. As a matter of fact, that’s what makes the picture so memorable – it has a heart. In every movie, there is a relationship to be established or repaired. That’s the B story. Making sure your B story is solid will add depth and emotion to your script, making it easier for the audience to relate to." 

In this case this was the Dean and Lucy storyline. Adding a little more drama with the what is dean up to - is he really that bad a date, scene will really help with this depth.

Therefore that should make Nath/Jake the c plot. 

"Okay, confused yet? Because there’s a C story in most every film, too. That’s the story of the character’s change, what most people call the “character arc.” Obviously this story goes hand in hand with the others, but it’s a good idea to have a clear grasp of a) what the character’s flaw is; b) when he realizes that flaw; and c) how he overcomes that flaw in the final challenge (climax)."

Instead of having a character flaw  with Nath i would like to see it as more as an obstacle or character trait he has to get used to. Something he is so ashamed of he can't admit to himself let alone anyone else. The c plot is Nath's discovery of himself. 

https://www.writersstore.com/making-your-a-b-and-c-stories-work-in-your-rewrite-paul-chitlik/

The points from this article were really helpful in helping me to outline and think a little bit more clearly about the types of storyline i was including. even though i have a lot of relationships in the show, i think i balance out the friendships fairly well and split the development of these storylines well.

major project: Research into series arc's

When i was looking at my work from pre production work into the series arc's it became clear that some characters, weren't really highlighted in the episodes. For example, in episode 6, Ollie doesn't have a storyline at all and he doesn't have a series arc. I decided to go into research mode to find out a bit more about series arc's in general and how they work.

Here are some videos i found useful:

I thought of the idea of having Ollie, grow as a player from episode 1 to episode 6. have him sit out the game due to his clear ineptness and then have him come back and provide an assist for the winner was a big deal. It gave his character a sense of closure from the start of the series where he ends up missing a penalty to this moment was a great idea.

The idea that a long arc is the best was really interesting, i also liked the idea that along the way the character changes but could also relapse was something really interesting. It is actually what i had in mind for Dean's character, It was always too easy to make everything go along swimmingly for him in his first proper relationship. He is still a baby in that respect and finding his feet in the dating pool, so having him revert back to his 'safe' place and sleep with Hannah felt like the perfect choice for his character.

Major Project: Overcoming writers block

Mid way through episode 6 i really struggled to get what i wanted from a storyline and genuinely had no idea how to move it forward. I had hit a wall and was worried i wouldn't be able to move on.
One of the writers i have been focusing my research on had a great quote that helped me to know everyone experiences it at some point.
"Writer’s block – embrace it, know it. It is your internal editor. It is telling you that you haven’t got it right yet, that you can write what you want to write, or the scene that you’re going to write, or the chapter you’re going to write – one reason, it’s not *right* yet. So listen to that voice and sit in agony until it all blossoms in your head. It’s not a fault, it’s just that you haven’t got it yet." 
Stephen Moffatt.

This helped me to know that all writers block truly is, is not being satisfied with the outcome yet. Not hitting the right notes. 

What i found whose was that i began to work on a separate project with some friends and it was so easy and joyful to write with them on this other project that i feel i had fallen out of love with the one i was creating. It was so difficult to sit down and find the words i wanted.  But i found an article that actually recommended writing while others are in the room. This is something that i had previously done but as i now was living by myself most of the time, it was difficult to find someone who could be around me and enjoy listening to my random sparks of ideas. 

http://www.theguardian.com/higher-education-network/2014/dec/22/overcoming-writers-block-three-top-tips

Do social writing – write with others.

As with other academic activities, interacting with others about ideas and plans is valuable. 

Social writing involves writing with others – not collaborative writing, but writing with others in the room. Writing with others, talking about writing-in-progress and sharing writing goals and achievements helps us to understand writing better. Social writing generates realistic goal-setting and dedicated writing time.

It also makes writing part of work and life. It is no longer something we only do in solitude. Discussing writing is interesting. Social writing reduces the main cause of writer’s block – anxiety – and stimulates writing. With social writing, there may be no need for help or instruction after all.

Writing has become for me, a solitary activity more than anything this unit, and although i enjoy writing, i also very much enjoy being part of a team and working with others. I tried my best to make sure i was getting out of the house and writing in places that i may also feel inspired. I went to cafe's and pubs a lot and often i would hear a conversation that would trigger things that could spark potential ideas which would help me with certain aspects of scenes. 

Another article i read had a very different approach but something that seemed to work for me. 

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/science-and-sensibility/201006/ten-top-tips-end-writer-s-block-procrastination

To boost your motivation, set up a reward and penalty system. 

This was something i had previously done with essay's i had found a chore, but i had never done it with scripts and storytelling. I rewarded myself with things i enjoy such as days out, booking my theory test and spending time with friends and gave myself penalties such as not being able to watch the new episodes of a tv show i wanted to see. This was effective because i knew i would hear other people talking about the show and this would mean i would find out things without watching it, spoiling it for me. It gave me no choice but to work on the project.

A video i watched also really helped and i wanted to post it here for myself to remember for the future. 

Major Project: Voicing the characters

During the project i had a problem with some of the dialogue. It didn't feel like it was working, and i was worried that i wouldn't be able to figure out why because the only way i had solved some of the dialogue with the pilot was hearing it during the table read. This got me thinking about maybe there was a way i could rework the script using friends i have that are actors as i knew the actors playing the roles wont be available.
I got together with a few of these friends and hosted a test table read to have them speak honestly about the dialogue and any problems they felt. I had someone time each scene in comparison to others and noticed some scenes were a little long while others were a little short and tried to expand. It was a really valuable experience and helped me to hear the problems rather than just see them as words on a paper.
I also did some research on testing characters voices.

http://nofilmschool.com/2012/05/tests-characters-voice-working-from-john

It has 5 questions, that i used to analyse each scene to try and make sure everyone who was required in each scene was there.

• Could you take the dialogue from one character in the script and have another character say it? 
• Is the character speaking for himself or is he speaking for the writer?
• Is the character expressing her own feeling in the moment, or is she expressing what needs to happen next [in the story]?
• What would a joke sound like from that character?
• Can you picture a given actor in the role, or at least preclude certain actors from the role because it doesn’t feel like they would say those things?

I feel that these 5 steps really helped me to develop some scenes, for example i had a scene where don's relatives were at Don's house trying to search for Don's wife. It felt as though there were far too many people in the scene especially for a show with already a high number of principal characters. In the end i found that some lines weren't needed and some lines could be said by Don's wife's friend and carer. I am a lot more satisfied with the scene now than it was before. 

Major Project: Research into writer - Steven Moffatt

Another show that has not only impacted my writing but also introduced me to the world of british sitcoms was Coupling. This was a show that was often referred to as the British version of friends. It was written by a man called Steven Moffatt who has since gone on to work on one of the biggest shows in the world as a writer and producer - Doctor Who.

Moffat said in an interview with BBC Writers room that he writes because it is what he has always wanted to do. He makes up stories, and then writes them down and from their it turned into a love of creating storylines. He also discusses how writers block should be embraced as it is your internal editor, it is telling you you haven't got it right yet.
I found it interesting that when he discussed developing characters he starts with a clique. This is something i unconsciously did when it came to dean and during his development i made it more human by adding in-depth details about his family, which came in handy when i realised his character was probably incredibly unlikeable on screen and it wasn't until you really heard about his past that someone might have a connection to him.
Something that hit home for me was when he was giving advice to emerging writers - write what you love. Since bend it like beckham came out i have always wanted to make a film about football. I love it. the first thing i ever filmed was a trailer for a film i wanted to make as a child about a female footballer. So i think creating this major project is defiantly a step in the write direction for me. i have had the freedom to write what i love. I liked what he had to say about writing for what you think other people will like as i agree that it wont work.

I looked on IMDB for his past shows as a writer and found that the first thing he worked on was a tv series called stay lucky where he wrote 1 episode. he then moved onto various other tv series's and tv films before writing every episode of joking apart & Coupling and has since gone onto write for doctor who and sherlock (which he also co created). 

I also learnt that might's wife was his producer and he often gave her his scripts to see if she laughed. 

 “I would go through a script and tick every laugh, to protect the joke.  Once you’ve been rehearsing something all week people start to think it isn’t funny – but I would look and see, I’d put three ticks by that line, so it must be good.  Then I could also see the parts that really weren’t working.” It helped moffat while he was developing the script as it allowed him to edit the work based on his wife feedback. She would often take the script to another room to read it and he could hear her laughing. This is also something i do with my housemate or even aimee/danny/chris. I run an idea past them to see if they think its funny and if they laugh i use it if not i move on or rework. 

I think it was been useful to research into Steven especially as he is a writer of a similar style show as what i am writing. 

Major Project: Contacting Toby Whitehouse

Simon mentioned it would be a good idea to contact some writers that have influenced me or have a link to the kind of show i am writing. I decided to begin by contacting Toby Whitehouse - the writer of one of my favourite shows - No Angels. This show made me not only want ton be a nurse but also was my first taste of how writing can affect someone - i had never been emotionally involved in a show before - i was 14 when this show broadcast and although it might not have been appropriate for me i fell deeply in love with the stories of these characters and it devastated me when it ended. Which  led me to find out more about the writer and what i can learn from him about his methods and storytelling.

I began searching for his agent to contact him but it became clear this wasn't going to be easy so i dropped him a message on twitter to find an address i could write to. I found the same question had been asked my others and came across an address but i wanted to be as professional as possible and approach his agent to check it would be ok to ask a few questions to him and not just have it look like fan mail. So i signed up for IMDB pro's free 30 day trial and found out that his agent is a lady called Cathy King with an agency called independent talent group. I had a phone number and email address direct for her and decided to give her an email.

In my tutorial simon mentioned finding out who the assistant of the agent is, is the best way to get a  response and so that became my next target. Once i had discovered the Assistant i emailed her also and provided a short list of questions:

Why did you become a writer?
Where did the idea for No Angels come from?
You've said in an interview that you like to flesh out your characters before going into plot. How do you go about this?
Research can play an important role in developing storylines especially when your working with established environments - Hospitals/NHS or in my case sunday league football - how do you go about this research?
What would you recommend a young writer do as a starting point in the industry? Is it a good idea to start with running jobs, working your way up and writing on the side?

I hoped that my questions would help with some of the issues i had faced but also give an incite to a writer that has had a big influence on me and the way they work.

Major Project: Post it's

Throughout the 6 drafts of the script i went through i used various methods that have been highlighted in previous posts. Something i found useful was to use post its. 

http://masteringfilm.com/planning-your-script-a-feast-of-post-its/

"My walls are filled with Post-It Notes, divided by project (there are six sections of wall dedicated to six projects), and very few of them contain any notes about plot points."

I took this and applied it to my problem. 

For example Simon gave me the feedback that Don's character needed to be explored further so i made a post it wall to see how many times characters were in the show to see how the distribution of characters fell in the show. It became clear that Don was basically in 2 scenes. I hadn't even given him a reason to turn up to the match on paper. In my head it made sense because i knew the character and why he would show but the audience weren't seeing it. So i added a few short scenes to explain why he might show up at the match. 

This tactic was also useful when i was looking to further develop the tension between the strood team and the Grove green boys. I needed to raise the stakes. Why would this team show up? why would the audience care? I needed them to have a confrontation. 

I used post its again for this problem. I highlighted where Strood were mentioned in order to develop that sub plot. This was interesting lesson as i could see that originally it was when Nath was jumped and then nothing until the match really. So i added a few more mentions, Why Strood would show, a mention from dean at the meeting with don, A confrontation with stood and then the match. 

Another past concern was my subplots i originally noticed i had no other scenes to swap between. I used post it's to help with this problem by writing the various plot points down and then seeing if they made sense. From this it became clear that the pub scene was a little redundant and i changed it to not only something that developed the characters and a sub plot of Nath's attack but also hint at a potential future storyline with Nath and his sexuality. This sub plot post it's also allowed me to further develop the storyline with dean and Lucy, Tom and Abbie and Ollie's comedic relief.

Overall i feel this post it tip has been a great find and i wouldnt have been able to redraft so efficiently without it. I feel i have been able to use a small amount of research, develop it way past its origin and apply it to multiple problems in order to develop my script.

Major Project: Treatment Research

As i had never written a treatment before, i wanted to research what kind of things went in to them in order to make it as professional as possible. I began by searching about treatments on google and found an article on this website:

http://www.charles-harris.co.uk/2013/10/12-essential-tools-for-writing-a-successful-film-or-tv-treatment/

"1. KEEP IT SHORT2. REMEMBER THE PURPOSE OF A TREATMENT3. MAKE IT REFLECT THE BALANCE OF THE SCRIPT4. INCLUDE THE SCRIPT’S ENDING5. MAKE IT READABLE AND MOVING6. SHOW ME AN ACTIVE PROTAGONIST7. AVOID AND THEN… AND THEN…8 CUT NEGATIVES, AVOID IMPERSONALS AND MAKE PASSIVES INTO ACTIVES9. WHILE YOU MAKE YOUR SENTENCES LINK AND FLOW10. STEAL ACTIONING WORDS FROM ACTORS11. STAKE THE FARM12. PUT PICTURES ON THE SCREEN OF MY MIND"

I found the keep it short bit one of the key things. As the script itself is 30 pages, having a concise treatment would help me to sell the idea to potential producers and companies. If i want them to read my script i need them to be interested in the project getting the plot and concept across quickly as in the real world there would be a stack of treatments and scripts and producers don't have time to read them all. I decided writing a 1 page treatment and then writing the entire 6 episode synopsis's as if they get past the treatment it would a good idea for them to see the whole series outline and my vision for where the characters go.

The first thing i had seen from the treatments i had read is to write a logline. This is something that i had practise with from previous years. So i knew that i needed to outline the plot of the show making it seem exciting and in keeping with the tone of the show.

"preparing a log line for your screenplay is a basic marketing tool that I have repurposed for developing treatments. It is similar to the summary given in TV Guide. It is a technique for boiling down a plotline to its essence that has been described as trying to vomit into a thimble. "

http://www.movieoutline.com/articles/how-to-write-a-treatment.html

The next section i thought to include was a premise. This was to outline the idea for the show in further detail. I had already wrote a premise in order to prepare for the pitch session with Simon. I reworked this as i felt it suited the tone of the show well and made it a little more relevant as the script has gone through many edits since the pitch.

http://mikedimartinostory.com/2014/05/21/writing-the-premise/
"The premise discussions are basically a more focused version of the season overview discussions. For me, the episode starts to click when I know the character’s emotional arc for that episode. "
This was something that stuck with me and also in turn had an impact on my episode synopsis's - i tried to show the emotional arc of the characters clearly. I tried to give a snippet of the characters personalities in the premise but in a more comedic way but also tell the drama storyline of the pilot - Nath getting beaten up. 

The final part of the treatment is format. This is vital for professional treatments.

http://www.antonymayfield.com/2012/06/13/how-to-pitch-a-tv-show/

"Your format and pitch to a commissioner need to be clear about what they are… Why you? Why me? Why now?: Sometimes it isn’t the strength of the idea that counts, but its context. One producer said that these three questions that quite often people pitching a format can’t answer."

From this research the why you? why me? part stood out, i wanted to make it clear why the show fitted Tekkers Tv as a platform as it was a sports channel with dramatic and comedy elements. I also wanted to explain why that time of day for releasing the show. It was based on research undertook by the producer. 
I felt having the format of what our show is about would help clarify the platform. As Tekkers Tv is a platform that myself, Chris and Danny founded i sat with them and Aimee to discuss the ideas for why we felt it would suit the channel. As producer Aimee led the discussion and based on feedback we gave to her she decided on the time for show. I also wanted to show the number of episodes and length of the episodes. I decided to create a 6 episode series based on the traditional amount for a UK series and the reason for 30 minutes was because that is roughly the length for sitcoms / drama comedies in the Uk. I could have done the online route where the episodes are usually much shorter but i felt the shorter length of time but more episodes didn't fit my vision for the show. I wanted time to explore the characters. Also this show is something i could see on a channel in the future so although it is currently for Tekkers TV i wanted to keep the format in keeping with what is currently broadcast to be able to potentially use it as a future pitch.

Overall i felt the treatment writing experience was an unusual one but still interesting and helped me to highlight the show concisely for others.

Major Project: Table read

In order to prepare myself for the table read i decided to research a little into them to find out the usefulness of them and why they are needed so as i could use this knowledge to assist me in making the most out of the table read.
I initially wanted to to the table read because i felt it would be a good opportunity to see how the script was coming along. For all the actors to come together, meet and see how their take on the characters had come across. I also hoped that Danny and Aimee would find it useful as Producer and Director and felt it would give Chris a chance to do some filming.
upon starting my research i found this website:
http://www.backstage.com/advice-for-actors/casting-director-note/why-table-reads-are-just-important-auditions/
It is written by Casting Director Marci Liroff who has worked with some of the most successful directors in the world such as Steven Spielberg, Ridley Scott, Mark Waters, Christopher Nolan, Brad Bird, and Herbert Ross.
She wrote:
"We have table reads for a few different reasons. When we’re trying to get the project off the ground, we invite investors and put together our favorite actors to help sell the material. Sometimes the writers and the creative team need the screenplay read so that they can hear how it plays. They often invite other writers so that they can discuss it after and do a “punch-up” for dialogue or for comedy. When I’m casting a feature film or television project, we invite the newly cast actors to a table read for the creative team, along with the studio and network executives. These readings can be very scary for the actor—even if she’s already been cast."

I found this interesting as i definitely was excited to hear it read for the first time and agree that it would be a valuable experience to see how the words bounce around. Is one actor having too much dialogue? Does it fit their character to be saying long speeches?

Major Project: Trimming the fat - Stage 1 of the rewrite

After a conversation with Aimee i came to realise i had given her the difficult task of casting 30 characters. After taking a look at the script through this lens i decided to see - if when i cut characters out would the story still make sense? If not Could main character have access to this information also and therefore be able to move the story along also?
With this is mind i went through the script with a tooth comb and highlighted anything i felt was vital - BLUE. I then used a different colour to highlight anything that was unneeded - PINK. I used another colour to show the bits i needed but could have another character say - YELLOW
 For example this is the first scene of the script:

Using this information, i began rewriting. This is the same scene but with the pink sections cut out, the yellow section is now said by Tom. 

I think by doing so it not only focus more on the characters that are important but realistically makes Aimees job a lot easier. Although the character, who's dialogue i deleted, is still in the show he is now more of a featured extra. I have done the same with another scene which i removed completely from the script and with that removed 5 characters from her casting list. 

http://www.movieoutline.com/screenwriting-blog/index.php/2011/08/dont-have-too-many-characters/

"Ask yourself, who is this person?  Why are they in this scene?  What do they contribute to the scene, protagonist/antagonist, plot and movie?  Are they merely a sounding board for you or your central characters? "

This quote is very similar to the thought process i took when scanning through the script. 

For example the character of the bar man - i loved my description of him - it was one of my favourite descriptions i'd written for character and because of that it held a little place in my heart. However when i asked myself these questions i realised he was mainly a vessel in which i was using to give the characters some information that they could know from elsewhere - he was to be axed. it was painful. but it was ultimately the right call. It also breathed new life into the script and left me with the interesting task of focusing in on each of the characters, and discovering what they might be doing if they weren't at the pub or playing football. Something that i will discuss in a separate post. 

Major Project: Research into Writers - Toby Whitehouse

There are a few writers who's story telling has captivated me since i was a child and while for some people that might involve big name TV or Film productions for me a lot of my favourite shows are often those that aren't that well known.

The first writer i decided to research is the creator and writer of one of my favourite tv shows - No Angels -Toby Whitehouse.
He has since gone on to create one of BBC Three's biggest shows Being Human which has since been remade into a US version with his involvement.

I found an interview on BBC Writers Room with him where he talks about how he creates characters and what comes first the beginning middle and end.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/writersroom/writers-lab/be-inspired/toby-whithouse

He says that as he trained as an actor first he is able to see lines of dialogue and know when the writer has never actually said this line out loud. For him he likes to say the line over and over and it will inevitably get shorter and concise until it does exactly what it needs to without being wordy.

 Something i found interesting was when he mentioned how he didn't like the idea of research and thought 'why let the facts get in the way of a good story' but when he was doing No Angels they did months of research and it turned up lots of stories of its own and thats the same with character bios which noone ever see's but he knows. This is something i do. I feel i know a lot about these characters, a lot more than perhaps the rest of my group, because i have spent months creating backstories and where they come from, why, their lives. I've immersed myself in the world and out of that has come new stories ideas.

Overall he had a lot of useful points that i can relate to as a writer and some that i will consider using in the future and see if it helps me out.

I looked on IMBD for his writer credits and found that the first show he worked on as a writer was Where the Heart is. He did a couple more episodes for other shows and then his created no angels for Channel 4. He has since gone on to create Being Human and now also writes for Doctor Who.

He also has acted in Bridget Jones's Diary and has a tendency to pop up as an extra in the shows he writes.

http://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/tv/features/meet-the-showrunners-from-steven-moffat-to-toby-whithouse-how-did-writers-end-up-seizing-the-reins-9386825.html

"I often talk to young writers and they're often desperate to get their own first show, and personally I think that's a terrible thing to happen to a young writer, because you have to learn the industry."

This is an interesting point and something i plan on doing. I would love to work in a writers room with other writers, using characters that may have existed for years and taking on their story with a fresh perspective and direction but still staying true to who they are. I think this advice is very useful and as much as i am enjoying have this freedom to create my own show, it will potentially be something i come back to in the future rather than a driving force in my career right now.

http://www.kasterborous.com/2015/05/toby-whithouse-game-writing-tips-magic-doctor/

"So I guess my advice would be: dance as if no one’s watching, write as if no one’s reading.”
This is something i found really insightful. Writing without a care is something i often struggle with. I feel like there is a lot of people relying and invested in this project particular that sometimes i feel a little like I'm never going to please everyone. So this made me think - Yes exactly - your not going to please everyone - so while spinning off some plot lines and how a future episode will flow i started writing like noone will ever read it and i although i still had those niggling thoughts in my mind, oh they aren't going to like tear part - it helped me evolve my characters. I knew this idea of having one of the characters come to terms with his sexuality might not be welcomed with open arms as it would if i was writing a scene where ollie does internet dating but having that freedom to explore possible areas like this are not only more relevant to the real world but are also make the storytelling richer. 

overall i think these research into Toby has helped and i may contact him as part of my on going research into writers to find out some more about how he works as a writer and how he got his first writing job etc

Major project: Raise the Stakes

After Simon read my script he mentioned that while reading it he kept asking why does the team needs a manager? What is at stake?
With this story being based on my own experiences i was probably thinking that this would be enough as in real life - we needed a manager or the team would fold and everyone would have to give up playing. However in the world of TV something bigger needs to happen. i decided to research into this a little to this idea and to see if they had an methods or strategies for doing so.

http://thescriptlab.com/screenwriting-101/screenwriting/script-tips/884-raise-the-stakes-crank-it-up
"You want to SQUEEZE your characters, constantly making it harder on them."

http://www.movieoutline.com/articles/how-to-raise-the-emotional-stakes-in-your-screenplay.html

"After years of working with many writers, I concluded that often when we begin to create screenplays, we come up against a basic instinct, which is to try not to generate conflict, but to resolve it. "

This is one of the problems. I think i am trying to resolve to much too quickly and not generating enough conflict. 

I found this strategy and decided to give it a go:

Step 1.  Set a timer for 15 minutes.
Step 2.  Without stopping, make a list of the worst things that can happen in your script and the effects these events would have on the various characters. Really let loose and leave the logic of your current story behind. For example, in the film, Casablanca, what if the Nazis were invading, and Ilsa had been two-timing Rick? What if he were captured and tortured?  While I don’t think Casablanca needed higher stakes, I intended this as example so you could apply the technique to your story.
Step 3.  Have your main character describe how these events changed the outcome of his or her life. Rick might write, “ I could have taken everything but knowing that she was sleeping with another man.”
Step 4.  Put the exercise away for a while and watch one or two movies in your chosen genre that were very successful and that you like.
Step 5.  Consider the relative stakes in these films and your script and make any adjustments.

Here are the ideas i wrote in that time period:

Step 2:

Step 3:

Step 4: I decided to watch Friday Night Lights and No Angels. Friday night lights is a tv show about an american football team and No angels is a drama comedy about nurses. I chose them because one is sports related and the other is situated around one commonality - working in a hospital similar to how mine is set around the football team.

Step 5: After watching the shows i realised how far i could push the script and decided to use the idea that a character could be beaten up - it raises the stakes as if i wanted to kill off a character id like to do it later in the series when people have grown attached to them - Shonda Rhymes style.

This was a really useful technique and helped me to move forward in a time efficient manner. I feel like i am starting to build up a skill set now for when i have a moment like this where i am stuck. This process is becoming less and less time constricting and making me realise that i have all the tools i need its just about thinking about it a different way - i think that this might also be something that could work as part of the script writing group. maybe we could all bring a scene we are finding particularly troublesome to a meeting and do a short task like this on that scene as everyone will bring a unique concept to that scene and see it a different way than you might in your own head - expanding the idea - something to suggest anyway.

Major project: Subplots

After i began writing my script i realised one fundamental flaw. All of my characters were in the one scene and i had nothing to cut to. 

When you watch Friends, for example,  there are times when all the characters are together but there are usually 2 (sometimes even 3) plotlessness throughout the episode. One is resolved at the end and the other moves the series arch forward. Therefore monica can be having a kitchen crisis and need's phoebe to help her out, while ross and rachel are having yet another lovers tiff, and chandler and joey are creating fire ball. the story's intertwine slightly and it gives the episode a greater depth. 
My problem was one that was just not going away and what was worse is that i had clear subplots for all my other episodes just not the pilot. 
I decided to go back to basics and research subplots for anything that might help me figure out my issue. 


http://www.movieoutline.com/articles/screenwriting-structure-series-part-14-subplots-and-the-midpoint.html

" In fact, it's okay to manipulate your spun off subplot into a planned subplot that helps serve the story better. "

"Just as your Protagonist is a character in conflict, so should your secondary characters be in conflict of some kind and hence, we follow this secondary character's struggles via the subplot and this subplot helps pull the main story into full focus by the end of the screenplay. "

I decided to split up the characters in my plot. I knew which 2 characters i needed in terms of dynamic for the A plot - Dean and Ollie which left me with Tom be a driving force in the A plot. My b plot could therefore focus on any of the other three main or secondary characters. However i knew which 2 characters i needed in terms of dynamic for the A plot - Dean and Ollie which left me with Tom and Nath.  I just couldn't think of where to go with them. 
My A plot is getting a manager. This idea of conflict made me think the subplot should be the search for players. I began thinking more about the dynamic between tom and nath. They both support Spurs but while nath is shy and awkward, tom is hot headed and brash. perhaps the conflict could be that tom slacks off while nath really puts in a shift to get some new players. however whenever i read those scenes i kept thinking why are we coming back here? what is so important about this scene? it felt like it was just something to cut to - and it was. 

http://www.crackingyarns.com.au/2011/01/26/the-secret-to-subplots-half-revealed/

"If a screenplay dies in Act 2 or Act 3, it’s just as likely the problem lies in the subplots as in the main narrative."

The above quote is exactly my point.

I deleved a little further into the research department hoping it would help. 

http://www.scriptmag.com/features/craft-features/ask-the-expert-making-sure-your-subplots-arent-sub-par

"The B Story is often the more emotional thing, and not the visual, tangible, action-y thing. It’s 
connected to your concept – but is usually caused because of or caused by your concept. It’s 
what your hook or major storyline leads your characters to (or to do)."

I have a long running sub plot throughout the show of the love story between Dean and Lucy but it 
isn't appropriate to introduce that story at this moment. Then it came to me.. tom is hot tempered. 
Nath is the reason the team have come back together - he has been attacked by a rival team. Maybe 
Tom can teach him a few self defence / fighting tips. 

This storyline could easily intersect the main storyline at the end of the episode and would also offer 
a more serious and softer side to the show. 

"Your subplots are basically a way for you to cut away from your main storylines and main 
characters infuse different life and personality into your story. These subplots do NOT
have to include your main characters, and probably shouldn’t. However, it usually does and SHOULD intersect and affect your major plotline at some point. "


I would be bringing different life to the story through this subplot. It would be a different tone and pace to the wedding vibe and also let us know about the characters a little more. Tom is aggressive but also is a teacher a 2 sided personality character and he's hoping to rub a little bit of teaching and aggression off onto weak and shy geek Nath. 

"The secret to successful subplots is to have them ultimately come back and have an impact on the main narrative."

This exact line became one of the biggest turning points for me. When i saw this, everything started to slot into place. I began to think more about how Tom's teaching nath could come back and impact the final scene. Initially i had Ollie score a goal - as he missed the penalty i thought it would be idea to have him score - sort of mirroring the start and end. However This idea of having the sub plot impact the main narrative made me think - maybe Nath should score - maybe an on running defender could go to take him out but he ducks and is in acres of space for dean to pace the ball into his path for him to tap home. Now with Nath being the goal keeper its slightly unrealistic however as its a 7 vs 7 match the pitch would be smaller and perhaps the others are so tired he just makes a break for it. 

This research i have undertaken has  clearly influenced my writing and the way that i think about plots as it has made me see the light and shade of the stories. Although i watch a lot of programs and see it happening on screen it hasn't translated into my writing yet so this is a new development for me. Im applying what I'm learning through research into my script. I think having this subplot in place will make the story richer.

"It’s a simple subplot that’s introduced without fanfare but it ultimately creates a complication that threatens the hero’s pursuit of his goal and triggers evolution of the character. That’s an effective subplot, wouldn’t you say? It works because it complicates and escalates the drama."

This subplot would defiantly help to increase the drama because Nath would be learning how to take care of himself, it evolves his character and the inciting incident earlier in the script has already threatened his pursuit of his goal.